Why can't you just love yourself

I've liked almost everyone I've ever me

Or at the very least I've rarely ever felt ill will for anyone

My issues are trying not to mirror unhappiness and /or anger

And not feeling pity or aggravation

Because I can only take so many high horses at a time

And then the facade cracks

And the anger comes forth

Lol

Just kidding

It's not a facade at all actually

It's that I have different facets of me

And one facet PMS'

And just gets aggravated at the build up of misogyny

And micro-aggressions

I sense in the world sometimes.

Real or imagined

My real issue I think

is that

I wish you all loved yourselves

And accepted yourselves. Your faults

Forgave yourselves from a place of depth and honesty

And once you have that happiness for yourself

It is very hard to try to keep others from theirs


------------------------

What am I talking about?

I get so lost

I can see a million ways to the same point

I can see almost all ways

I can see that they can be and are just as valid

Or how they can be also contradicted

Or how the can be seen as abhorrent by supposed "nornal" standards

But they got there for a reason

Everyone gets to where they are for a reason

And once you see that

It becomes almost completely understandable

And even logical

It really does

What do I know though

The few times I've shined my light

Super bright for others to see

It hasn't always been met so well by all

It's been met mostly by fear

Their own fear projections

Either for myself

Or for themselves

 or worse yet

It's been met with jealously

Maybe I've just got to commit to it

No. I don't know actually what exactly it would take.

I venture to say that I need to slow down

I need to take life one moment at a time and that

No matter how much time it takes

No matter what gets missed

Or what does gets done and attended to

That I truly let go of all the unnecessary

No more future

No more past

-------------

It's a glorious way to be

When we all pitch in

And help each other out

Work together

Really get to know each other

And accept each other

Does the devil gain more power by having it concentrated

All to itself (himself?)

Or by dividing it amongst us humans

I don't know if I want to know

Facade upon facade

Sometimes the world just weighs on me

The contrived rituals

The idiotic fallacies

The charades we play

And the characters we portray

It weighs so heavy on my heart

All the pretenses

The myriad of facades staring back at you

All around

Wherever you look

Even when you're just looking in the mirror

I wish we could all just be stripped back down

To our innocence

To our whole real beings

To our raw true selves

But that requires a level of truth

We are all so far removed from

In our daily lives



It would probably be like traveling to a completely foreign place all alone

With no knowledge of the language, customs or terrain

With no currency on hand to make your way with ease

And no one to guide you

Terrifying thought to most people

For good reason

What can you depend on?

When you can't depend on your defenses, manipulation, prestige, attributes and wealth

When the walls you've built that create who you are are no longer valid

Who are you when you strip it all away?

Can you even say?

Do you even know?