As it should be

Today, as I was cleaning the bathroom floor, I was thinking that all is as it should be, and that I am not always, or rather mostly, privy as to why things are as they are. The way I see it, things happen exactly as they are meant to happen. So I need not pre-occupy myself asking why or even trying to figure it out. And if I can't have gratitude and acceptance, then I must strive to simply make the best of it. It's kind of nice to know that I have no control, but am here simply to enjoy all I can of every single moment. Squeeze the most joy and happiness from my own personal experiences of life.

Along these same lines, it occurred to me that God, being only love, has complete and total understanding and acceptance of me, for every single thought and action. So how then can I disappoint God, when God has nothing but absolute unconditional love for me. I can not. I believe God's deepest desire is simply to have a connection with me. Similar, but on a grander scale, then a benevolent grandparent, that wants nothing more than my happiness and to share in that happiness. And I think my deepest obligation is only to be aware of that love. I think too, that God is always reminding me, every day, in every moment, of the splendor and joy of life and love. Yet, I am so busy sometimes and out of touch with it, that I do not notice or pay it mind. All the wonderful things that could bring me closer to the divinity of God, things as subtle as the warm breeze caressing my cheek, can go by completely un-noticed. If I could just find time to rejoice in every moment that life has bestowed upon me. How great would my life be?

And I think it would stand to reason that then, this divinity... this joy, would flow from me freely, in every thought and every action. Bringing about the spirit of God through me into the world. Like a siphon of love... the spirit of God. Isn't that what I am truly meant to be?

Yet..... if all is as it should be.... and God accepts me as I am, if God leaves me to make up my own decisions, see things as I wish to see them, then in the eyes of God can I ever be wrong? If God does not judge and simply loves, then why can't I simply keep going as I am going and doing what I am doing and not worry, knowing God loves me just the same? Because I know that in the deepest part of myself I am longing for this connection, longing to feel this love. Because while the love is always there for me, it is my thoughts and actions that open my heart to it and let it flow stronger or barely at all. So when I am in tune to it, when my hearts wide open, I am closest to it, I am connected strongly, and in return my deepest longing is satisfied and I am truly at peace and deeply happy. And it is here, waiting for me, in every moment, in every breath, with no monetary cost, no obligation to anyone but myself....to be open to it. To be open to God, to be in tune with the love and divinity, which is the source of my true self. All I have to do is start using my heart. Which like any muscle, grows stronger with use.

I can start simply. Can I feel the love of God inside of me? Can I feel the unconditional acceptance? The complete understanding, absolute forgiveness, and unconditional love. I’m going to practice feeling it as long as I can. Practice feeling this love every day, for a minute, then 2 minutes.. and so forth.. until maybe one day I can feel it every moment. Would it not be so that then it would flow from me out into everything I do, everything I think, everything I say. This love and acceptance. How could it not? For underneath the muck and mire of what I have been taught to think and believe is the limitless, divine power of love, waiting for me.