Still struggle

I still struggle sometimes with the paradox between

Letting fate play its role

And setting things in motion For myself

In this specific instance I am referring to dating.

*****

I’m on tinder.

Putting myself out there

Subjecting myself to unwanted judgement

And people with nefarious motives

With the hope that by putting myself out there

I increase the chances of finding what I’m looking for

But does it work that way?

Or does fate intervene when it decides it is the right time

Place

Person

To bring what I need

When I need it

Regardless of my pursuits

I don’t know.

I really don’t know.

Mortal

I never felt my mortality

Until I had kids

And at that moment

I cared so much about my life

Because I cared so much about this little ones life

And I didn’t want to miss any of it

I didn’t want to miss a single drop of them

And my life all of a sudden

Had this new depth

Felt much more meaningful

All because of a life born from it