Faking it

Sometimes I still feel like I’m faking it

And then I realize

I’m really not

It’s just that some days it takes more effort than others

But I’m still me

And I have the way I do things

The way I think

My general responses....which

Are within a spectrum I find enjoyable

Genuine

And acceptable upon inspection; generally speaking

Enough so that it makes me feel I don’t need to worry

But then again; I don’t want to become complacent either

And just believe I am a good person

Without actually being one

Simply because I want it to be so

I know I still have work to do

I still could improve

So I have compassion for myself as I struggle sometimes

And also I have a desire to have more depth

To be the best and most sincere version of me I can be

With my heart above my head

With kindness above obliviousness

With giving above receiving

And love above judgment

It’s a work in progress

I am a work in progress

And I’m thankful

To have something to focus on right now

besides the sadness

That has been engulfing me a bit lately