Had a hard day

Confusing day*

Spoke to probably one of the absolutely smartest people I've ever talked to.

A guy with a great heart. Good, good man.

And he had me upside down

(Head out of gutter please)

Looking at things from so many sides

Because

It can be fun

But it's all a shit show

It's all people doing the best they can

In what life gave them

And having to look hard at yourself

And how you ended up how you did

Holding up that mirror to yourself

That's a hard pill to swallow

Isn't it?

But you never learn more

Than at that moment

When the vail of your masque gets peeled away

The one you never even reveal to yourself

The one you're scared to talk about

If you let yours to recover from that

With humility

With acceptance

With gratitude

And truly learn from it

Life will change right?

Once you become truly aware

What choice do you have

Can't live in denial forever

Right?

God, I am confused. God please show me the way. God please open my heart to your plan for me.  Because I know. My life is not my own. It is really your life. The life you gave me.  And I am trying so hard to be here to serve it.

*so excuse my previous writings for the day.  My thinking is very skewed today.